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The Day Isaias Visited Obama

Last November Isaias Afeworki, President of the tiny country of Eritrea, made a big fuss to President Obama why Ethiopia was receiving so much development aid while Eritrea was simply ignored.  Obama, who was campaigning on

Last November Isaias Afeworki, President of the tiny country of Eritrea, made a big fuss to President Obama why Ethiopia was receiving so much development aid while Eritrea was simply ignored.  Obama, who was campaigning on behalf of Hillary Clinton at the time, had little time to explain his actions to the disgruntled president of Eritrea. Instead he asked him to fly over to Washington for a discussion before he leaves the Whitehouse for good.  President Isaias promised to pay Obama a visit soon. And as promised he travelled to Washington without much fanfare to see the US president.

Upon arrival Obama clearly laid down the parameters of Isaias’ visit. He told his visitor that he should fulfil a set of prerequisites in order to become eligible to receive development aid.  Isaias agreed.

Obama proceeded by instructing Isaias to answer three questions to do with Bo, the family dog.  ‘Bo is struggling at the moment in showing his affection to Sunny, our female dog’, Obama said.  ‘Your job is to revive Bo’s passions by making him do three things: laugh, experience sadness and undergo a shocking incident’, he added. ‘We hope those three traits would trigger a chain reaction in Bo so he would soon begin to show some affection towards Sunny.  Isaias thought that was a piece of cake, and he soon set out to execute the first task in making Bo laugh.  So he leaned over and whispered something in Bo’s ear. Much to Obama’s surprise Bo began to snicker uncontrollably as he pointed his paw at Isaias again and again.

Curiously enough Obama asked Isaias how he managed to make Bo laugh. Isaias said, ‘Actually I did not say much – I just asked Bo if he would like to come with me and visit all my friends back home’.  Obama was bemused.  He said ‘I got it!’, and then he turned to Michele and whispered, ‘Bo is clever enough to figure out that Isaias has no friends whatsoever’.  ‘You see’, he added, ‘the president put each and every one of his old friends in jail … that is why Bo thought his claim was a bluff and outrageously funny’.

Having passed the first test, Isaias asked if he could move on to the next task – to make Bo experience sadness.  ‘By all means, Mr President!’ said Obama.   Then Isaias approached Bo once again and whispered something in his ear. Bo whimpered as he paw-wagged – he was clearly distressed. Intrigued by Bo’s behaviour, Obama asked Isaias what he said to Bo that made him so agitated.  Isaias replied: I asked Bo if he would like to visit and be friends with the Eritrean young men and women around Washington DC area. ‘Aha, clever question’, said Obama; then he turned to Michele and said ‘You see, I understand Bo’s anxiety now; he does not want to become a robot like the YPFDJ followers, the president’s drilled young supporters. Poor dog! That is why he is so distraught!’

Isaias rubbed his hands and said, ‘two down, one to go!’  Obama said, ‘this is your final hurdle, Mr President’.  ‘If you can make Bo experience shock then the money is all yours … good luck!’ Without wasting any time Isaias grabbed Bo’s ear and whispered again.  This time the dog simply collapsed with a thud and passed out. Alarmed, Obama summoned help among the Whitehouse staff. Then he turned to Isaias and gave him a dirty look. ‘What on earth have you done to my dog?’ he glared.  Isaias, confused by Obama’s reaction, said: ‘all I said to your dog was I would take him to Asmara with me!’  Obama, realising how the Eritrean president put Bo’s life in danger, summoned his security people and instructed them to escort Isaias to the airport right away.

The moral of the story is not to allow Isaias to whisper in your ears.

Anon

aseye.asena@gmail.com

Review overview
53 COMMENTS
  • Haile stupid Drue December 23, 2016

    አብጥቓ ኢሳያስ ከማን አይቀርብን ስራሕ ሲኢኑስ ከዛርቦ ቁልሕ ኢሉ ከማን አይሪኦን ኦባማ እኮ ሰብ ኢዩ መልአኽ አይኮነን

  • Haile stupid Drue December 23, 2016

    አመሪካውያን ንመንግስቶም ይልምኑ አለዉ ምስ አንበሳ ናቅፋ ክዕረቁ ንስኻ ክአ ኢሳያስ ንኦባማ ለሚንዎ ትብል ምኻን ሕቅኻ ኢኻ ኢቲ ዝሐለፈ አኸባ ብባዐል ዳንኮነል ድቃስ ክሊኡካ

  • Haile stupid Drue December 23, 2016

    እሞ ሕጂ ድአ አመሪካ ኢንድያ ክንበጽሐካ ትብሎ ዘላ እዚ ወረ ንዐኹምን ንወያነን ድቃስ ለይቲ ከሊኡኩም ኦባማ ንኤርትራ ክበጽሕ እንተደልዮ ክሐትት ጥራይ ኢዩ ዘለዎ

  • PH December 24, 2016

    Mr.stupid,
    Can you tell us if Obama’s america need ናይ ጣዕሳ visa? ኢንተ ኢቲ ከልቢ ግን ድሮ ናይ ጣዕሳ forum ስለዘይ ፈረመ ኣይኣቱን ኢዩ።2% ኢንተከፊሉ ግን ዚኣቱ’ዶ
    መስለካ? ኢቲ ትፈልጦ ቅጥዒ ቅጥዒ ሃተፍተፍ….

    • Fithawi December 24, 2016

      You are fucking more stupid ignorant muslim terrorist murderer wedi garbage Mohammed monster beast. The dog with Esayas is not real but only a statue and is more peaceful than you fucking muslim terrorist beasts who are murdering innocent people and causing so much miseries and damages on Christians all over. But sooner than later we kill you all shity garbage muslim murderer ignorant animals just like your monster murderer garbage islam Mohammed.

  • Z, Hagos December 24, 2016

    Isaias is not courageous enough to be called even a Cuprare let alone a leader. The source of Isaias’s failure is that he makes others be blamed for his mistakes. Under the illusion that he is the best, Isaias has failed to learn from his mistakes.
    ..
    The progress being achieved by the neighboring countries enrages him. Instead of trying to get the neighboring countries to help him to become like them, Isaias’s policy is focused on destabilization of the region. Isaias is using every destructive means available in an effort to make the neighboring countries failed states like Eritrea, where there is no food, no water, no electricity, no freedom pushing the whole population to flee the country.
    ..
    The Eritreans as well as the people of the neighboring countries call Isaias an evil because his strategy is only focused on spreading fear like an infection and then finger pointing at others. The UN’s advice to Isaias is to treat his supporters like people in order for them to behave like human beings and see what is right and wrong. Only then Isaias will come to know the difference between right and wrong.

    • Almaz December 24, 2016

      Christmas post card from Assena

      What is up with the dog? Never mind the garbage and the unflattering pictures you and Awate use when you want to demonize this person. He is a leader to some segment of our society based on the associated picture used and the season we are in now it is not far-fetched for someone to assume the writer of this garbage is tribalist and best or religious fanatic. Shame for Assena to have this picture.

      Merry Christmas.
      Alamz

    • koubrom December 25, 2016

      Z HAGOS we all know what issayas accomplish for his country and his people
      Even for your kedae woyane who fought with him all the way to adis abeba, but you forgot that hein ,but it’s normal for agamean to back stub friends. about his courage
      well he and his army chocked woyane when they try to invade eritrea with the blessing of the west
      That your tplf regime still checking from that moment. And soon it will gone for good .
      And about the progress kkkkkkkkk getting welfare in exchange to be their puppet you call that progress?
      And please stop your propaganda her we have food, water, and electricity and most of all we have peace far better than everything
      Your criminal tplf try to distabilize eritrea and guess what it back lash on him kkk
      (Wohatuwo deaa)
      I like to listen bereket mengistab kkk

  • Z, Hagos December 24, 2016

    An empty leader that does not deserve any respect becomes a laughingstock. No quality moves ever been taken by the tyrant Isaias and some people are using that of him in their entertaining jokes to explain what a failed leader Eritrea has. The jokes about Isaias are just pain relievers to the justice seekers and real pains to Isaias’s supporters.
    ..
    The justice seekers should focus on using standup Eritrean comedians to explain the situation in Eritrea in humorous ways and jokes. The joke-lovers will automatically become part of the justice seekers elements to produce more similar jokes. Indeed, our people inside Eritrea are suffering from abuses and neglect. And as abused people, they really deserve some jokes to reduce their stresses and to lighten the loads of their hard days.

  • Simon G. December 25, 2016

    Wish Bo to get well soon. Btw, Bo is black.
    I was hoping the article to state that someone threw the device isayas to the Atlantic ocean on his way back.

  • Koubrom December 25, 2016

    WHAT EVER YOU CAN CALL HIM ,WHAT EVER YOU CAN DEMONIZE HIM
    HE WILL BE ALWAYS ABOVE YOU IF HE WANTED TO BOW DOWN FOR WELFARE ,HE COULD
    CONSTITUTION,FACKE DEMCRACY LIKE WOYANE DID WITH 100% WIN ELECTIONS AND GO TO THE WHITE HOUSE FOR THEIR BLESSING .AND DO WHATEVER THEY TELL HIM TO DO,HE WOULD BE CALLED ONE OF THE GREAD PRESIDENT GOOD FRIEND OF UNITED STATES
    NO COI ,NO HARRASSEMENT ,NO MEDIAS BIAS EVEN IF HE COMMIT A GENNOCIDE
    M I RIGHT ?THIS HOW WOYANE RULE ETHIOPIA ?????? AND HE WOULD BE RICH RIGHT ????
    You GUYS CANNOT SLEEP WITHOUT CALLING HE NAME AND FANTASISING WHAT YOU WISH TO SEE IN ERITREA.
    ISSAYAS AND ERITREA STILL STANDING AND TALL .THE WORLD KNOW NOW HOW MALEVOLENT IS TPLF IT HAVE BEEN EXPOSED FOR SO MANY CRIME FROM 25 YEARS
    OPEN YOUR EYES GUYS ,WHO YOU THINK YOU MISLEADING .? ETHIOPIA.?..
    They are about to eat you soon .
    So Tigray illness will be cure soon ,by Ethiopian.
    So stop shaming naming Eritrea worries for your Tigray cause you will never be like before ever again.
    WE STOOD OUR GROUND TO THE LAST AND ITS PAYING
    NO MORE FEKERA NO MORE JAHRA, NO MORE ABAY TIGRAY , ITS GAME OVER GET ON With IT

    • PH December 25, 2016

      ገልጠምጠም ዝብል ገረወይና!

    • yemane December 25, 2016

      Hey Mister Kubrom how could you compare woyane with higdef, higdef is a political party who had a failed leader as a consequence of this a failed state could be created. more or less woyane can create a federalized country. even the country can show an amazing progress with in the last 15 years even this progress can be the head lines of the great social media as like CNN, BBC and so on. not only this but also the finance firms
      can say ssomething about Ethiopia, as to mention some of it “African lion”. so how could you compare woyane with higdef . could you tell me please the advances of higdef. nothing rather than committing the country to wars with all the neighboring countries as like a mad dog did.please kubrom write the fact one rather than posting false article.

      • Koubrom December 25, 2016

        YEMANE HOW DID THE LEADERS FAIL ?.
        It’s Eritrea a fail state.?.hoW ??
        SO YOUR FEDERALISM SYSTEM ITS A SUCCESS??? I leaves it to your conscience if you have one of course.
        The whole world is watching your beautiful success people shouting everywhere viva woyane right ???
        No need to explain about western media ,of course they will say everything good about Ethiopia,TPLF is a good servant puppet so it’s least the can do for his service , taking land from the poor and sell it to foreign corporate sending troops wherever they asks him,
        Your TPLF can not even guarantee food for his people ,always stretching his hand for aid ,if that is a success to you ,well bravo we all watching the results
        About Eritrea well we never provocted any war against our neighbors it’s your propaganda media insinuating that,Eritrea have the right to defend himself from any foreign treats.so I don’t need to say more the fact speech for himself who is the aggressor
        TPLF is no lion or elephant as pretend it’s a fail party who divide Ethiopia by race and religion creating a rifts between Ethiopian
        Now it backlash on him don’t yet what to do ,there is no way for him .soon it disappears we will tell our future great children how woyane was a success stories

        • Sol December 26, 2016

          koubrom,
          In our beloved country
          No budget
          No constitution
          No parliament
          No rule of law
          No institutional governance
          The brutal dictator is the budget, constitution, law etc.
          Such a state or a country may be had existed in the middle age.

          • JHB December 26, 2016

            Koubrom,
            In our beloved country
            No budget = Bog Ultra Dull Ground Ethiopia Term Just wonder if someone with empty pocket allocating billions is this is called a budget? For that matter the UUUUUSSSSSAAAAAA does allocated budget of trillions while the country is in deficit in trillions of dollars
            No constitution = A country can run in customary, civil, and criminal codes. eg UK
            No parliament = Unless people are were aware of political ramification and use of parliament it is not use to have one. (eg Ethiopia w/ 100% winner of single party, Uganda president for life, the USA a president just elected by EC and by the minority of its people.
            No rule of law = there is one for those who believe/trust the rule of the land
            No institutional governance = Last I check the country got ministers and all other
            The brutal dictator is the budget, constitution, law etc.
            Such a state or a country may be had existed in the middle age.

        • yemane December 26, 2016

          So, what did you say the escape or flee of young eritreans to the neighboring countries every day. did the young Ethiopians flee to Eritrea? Never ever could happen. at least young Ethiopians could die challenging their government Infront and finally their government bring certain changes. but the reverse, young eritreans simply flee from their beloved country and die trying to cross the Mediterranean sea. I think it is better to
          die while challchallenging your government rather than crossing the sea. had there been peace and good governance in Eritrea why do they prefer to flee from their beloved country? so mister kubrom I am not supporting woyane but higdef can not be compared with woyane at any circumstances. do not fool your self even you know the fact one.

          • yemane December 26, 2016

            my reply is just to kubrom

          • koubrom December 26, 2016

            yemane most who flee are eritrean ,they are ethiopian
            it easy to have refugee statu if you claim to be eritrean
            even if they are fleeing because of bad governance
            they emigrating for better life as every body do
            now europe are aware
            but in country is different your criminal is taking their land
            and sell it to rich foreign company
            please m tired of stupid question ,
            any way why you feel concern about eritrea if you tigrayan mine your own buisness will be good

  • Michael Tesfamariam December 25, 2016

    To Assenna
    It is good to publish the name and contact details such as Twitter or Facebook or Email of the author at the bottom of the article- so that readers will have a chance to communicate with the writer directly-regardless the article was written by a contributor or by Assenna Team, the author’s contact details must be provided.

  • Z, Hagos December 25, 2016

    Unlike the fake news by the agents of Isaias, a joke is a joke about the nature and behavior of Isaias. For years Isaias depended on fake news to look like a big guy. His supporters suffered a lot to cover up his weaknesses. But truth is truth. The guy has nothing. If really really Isaias is put on the scale of achievements, he did nothing at all. He might be an expert in destruction but if he cannot rebuild those destroyed, he should be accountable for what he did and destroyed.
    ..
    More jokes that expose Isaias’s leadership as an empty guy, for sure, will help to make things clear for those blinded by fake news about Isaias. Get to know better about Isaias through jokes will help solve the Eritrean problem. Although more than 95% of the Eritreans know by now that Eritreans were better off under colonization, people believe there is a need to first convince the remaining 5% about Isaias’s emptiness before removing and putting Isaias in jail. Otherwise, no ifs and buts to cover up the continuous failures of Isaias.

    • Thomas December 25, 2016

      Z.Hagos
      You stated that “Although more than 95% of the Eritreans know by now that Eritreans were better off under colonization, people believe there is a need to first convince the remaining 5%”.
      My only question to you is ‘under which colonization you referring to, would it be under Egyptian/Turkish, fascist Italian or imperialist British’?
      As I don’t believe at all that Eritreans were under colonization with their own people under the Ethiopians. The moslems of ELF had to create colonization drama to fool our gullible people.

      • koubrom December 25, 2016

        Thomas all eritrean are aware of your sinical agenda
        1998/2000 war was the project if it is not our vaillant army and the determination of our leader the existence of eritrea would be into
        question today ,we are all aware semer paltak,assena ,awate,or the
        stupid tesfasion in youtube have the same root all the to tigray
        so waist your time agamee you had your chance in 1998 /2000 war
        infortunatly for you tplf has been defeated badly ,you will never have
        the same strenght again and if you try well jegna wedi alow
        but it s good to see agamee in this comments acting as eritrean ,trying to mislead our people shameful , i think you will never learn agamee ,
        you just keep trying when it s game over ,eritrea is far more stronger and out from reach

      • Z, Hagos December 25, 2016

        Thomas, can you say what your wrote to yourself in Tigrigna so you can understand the impact of your input on the ongoing discussions. I think you have to correct your info and correct your understanding and correct what you are saying: ” I don’t believe at all that Eritreans were under colonization with their own people under the Ethiopians.”
        ..
        Firstly, the borders of Eritrea were created during the scramble for Africa or almost at the same time the present European nations became nations within known borders. The borders of the present Ethiopia only became known as a nation after the second world war. The late Meles’s explanation to this effect may help you to see what you are missing.
        ..
        Secondly, you mentioned Egyptians, Turkish, Italian and British rules in Eritrea. Those rules make the present Eritrea different from the present Ethiopia. Therefore, we are talking about different people in different countries: Eritrea and Ethiopia.. Accordingly, you have to add the Ethiopian colonization or illegal rule to the list. Therefore, Eritrea was colonized by Egyptians, Turkish, Italians, British and finally by Ethiopians.
        ..
        Thirdly, your Emperor’s colonization became unbearable to Eritreans when he declared his only care for the land and not the Eritrean people. His policy of “emptying the water to kill the fish,” had gone beyond the red line in that Eritrean villages were burned down, and people were burned alive. However, his policy of turning the Eritrean people against other not only failed but bounced back and ate him up.
        ..
        Fourthly, The Eritrean Revolution saved Eritrea and the Eritreans from the cruel black colonization and crushed the colonizers with the help of some Ethiopian revolutionists.
        ..
        Fifthly, the remnants of pro-Haile Selassie won’t believe what they see. Now, I may link your saying of “I don’t believe at all that Eritreans were under colonization with their own people under the Ethiopians – you listen to what you are saying: under Ethiopians, what under Ethiopians? Go enjoy your wording of the honey-coated sweet word “under Ethiopians..”

        • koubrom December 25, 2016

          Z HAGOS STOP YOUR FLIP FLOPING , YOU AND THOMAS ARE THE SAME SHIT ,STOP YOUR METELAL YOU UNDERESTIMATE ERITREAN PEOPLE WE CAN SEE FROM FAR THE DEVIL YOU ARE
          YOU ARE NOT ERITREAN WHY YOU LYING ,YOU SAID 95% OF ERITREAN REGRET COLONISATION KKKKKK ,WHAT A GARBAGE YOU ARE ,SHAMEFUL ,SHAMEFUL ,
          YOU AN TIGRAYAN KNOW WHAT WE ERITREAN IS BETTER FOR US ????
          YOU TIGRAYAN ARE A CURSE FOR US SINCE LONG ,LONG TIME AGO SO KEEP DIGGING THE HOLE FOR US SOON IT WILL BE YOUR TOMB .
          ERITREA WILL SHINE LIKE SUN FOR YOU THE GAME IS OVER

      • AHMED SALEH !!! December 25, 2016

        It is okay to run away from taking responsibilities of the sufferings but you can
        not hide from reality . Moslems of ELF are native Eritreans and your can live for life in denial . Colonization under Ethiopia rule ruined the future of our country
        similarly HGDF under Issaias rule left ERITREA in a state of neglect .
        And to point finger at Moslems in Christmas day can not wash the sins your alike committed to their own people . DO NOT FOOL YOURSELF ..
        MERGHEM TEREGHAMAT NIHAGHERNA LEKHAKHIMUA ALO

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